Are Kübler-Ross’s Stages of Grief Still Relevant?

The Kübler-Ross model—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance—has long been a cornerstone in understanding grief. Originally conceived to describe the emotional journey of terminally ill patients, it has since been generalized to many forms of loss. But does it still hold up in today’s nuanced understanding of grief?

One advantage of the model is its simplicity. The stages provide a framework for naming complex emotions and validating that grief is not a linear process. Many clients find solace in realizing their reactions are “normal” and shared.

However, modern research and alternative frameworks have raised important critiques. Grief, it turns out, rarely follows a prescribed order. Models like William Worden’s Tasks of Grieving—accept the reality of the loss, process the pain, adjust to a changed world, and find a way to remember the deceased while moving forward—acknowledge the active, varied, and individualized ways people grieve. Others, such as the Dual Process Model, emphasize oscillation between confronting loss and engaging in restoration-focused activities, which feels more adaptable to experiences beyond death, such as divorce, job loss, or identity shifts.

For many, grief is not about “acceptance” as an endpoint but about integrating the loss into their lives. The stages may resonate for some, but rigid adherence can oversimplify the deeply personal nature of grief.

Ultimately, Kübler-Ross’s framework remains a useful entry point but should be paired with flexibility and attention to the unique needs of each individual. In therapy, we explore these feelings—not as stages to complete but as a part of your ongoing journey toward healing and balance.

If grief is weighing you down, let’s navigate this together. Therapy provides the space to honor your loss while moving toward hope and resilience.